Get all 9 Jude Perl releases available on Bandcamp and save 20%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Jude Perl and the Saga of SugarHope Records, Participation Award, Making A Christmas Tree, Hey Hi Hey Hello, I Have A Face, Embrace (Soundtrack), Modern Times, Sorry, and 1 more.
1. |
Ten Seconds
03:30
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I got 10 seconds to make you think
What I’m selling is so unique
That if you don’t buy it now
You could miss out forever
I got 10 seconds to make you see
You’re inadequate sexually
But if you buy this now
You could have sex forever
Forever… forever….
Don’t you wanna have sex forever?
What is wrong with you?
Don’t you care about her pleasure?
Are you a man or aren’t you?
I got 10 seconds to undo
Any self-realisations you’ve gone through
And if you’re intellect’s gotten strong
I’ll bring it back down to where it belongs
I got 10 seconds, that is all
To show you all the germs in your toilet bowl
And all your friends are judging you
Cause they can see the microscopic germs too… yes they can
Oh don’t you wanna impress your friends?
Your shallow friends who make it hard for you to fit in
Your friends that seem obsessed with the smell
Of the one room in the house that you’re allowed to shit in
I make so many moneys
Off your fears and insecurities
Your fractured psyche literally paid for my house in Hawaii
I’d sell honey to a bee
And Green-Peace branded NFTs
There really is no stopping me
Maybe she’s born with it (haha!)
Probably not, let’s be real
Without this make up from M*belline
You’re pretty much a worthless human being
Once you pop, you can’t stop
Because this is a highly addictive product
Melts in your mouth not in your hands you boast
Made by child labour from the Ivory Coast
Bada bah bah bah I’m lovin’ it
Are you loving it? I hope you’re loving it
And it looks like your kids are loving it!
HAVE YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH LOVE?!
You're a piece of shit
I got 10 seconds to exploit
Human being’s weakest points
Encouraging you to never question it
It’s like evolution ... but the opposite
The weaker you are the more success I get
In 10 seconds, and sometimes less
You bet, I make you think it was your idea
You’re so smart have another beer!
10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1… You’re mine!
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2. |
Contagious
03:35
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Baby, I look into your eyes
I feel the fire burning deep inside
Maybe it’s cause you’re so confident
But I’m guessing a more likely cause is I’m fructose intolerant
Your love’s contagious oh yeah
Just like the genital warts I got from Steve
Ooh, contagious oh yeah
Or maybe I gave them to Steve
But I’m so in love with you, how do you expect me to
Remember when and where I, got my STI
Love is a mystery, just like my sexual history
Tonight it’s you and me, and my HPV
Darling, I’m falling at your feet
I know that you’re the one, who will make my life complete
What you’ve started, I’ve never felt this way
Except when the exact same thing happened with some hot guy the other day
Your love’s outrageous oh yeah
Just like a goblin in a hardware store
Oh, outrageous oh yeah
What is he even looking for?
But I’m so in love with you
How do you expect me to
Know the reason why
For a mythical creature’s DIY
Love is so complicated
Ikea desks are overrated
Tonight it’s you and me
And that goblin if he’s free
This is the bridge… the bridge of the song
Yeah, this is the part of the song
That’s the bridge
Ooh makes it seem like this song
Has a lot more going on
If you put a bridge in, just put a bridge right there in it
Not so close to the end it’s still got time to build up again
Normally… After the 2nd chorus
That is the most logical place to put it
Oohh songwriting formulas
This is the… BRIDGIEST part of the song so far
Ahhhhh BRIIIIIDGGGGE
(End of bridge)
Your love’s ambitious oh yeah
Juts like a stage mum with an ugly kid
Oh delicious oh yeah
Like a lobster in a satin slip
I’m so in love with you
How do you expect me to
Give fashion information
To an underdressed crustacean
Love gives me stomach tension
Wait, that’s just indigestion
Tonight I’ll be your queen
Tomorrow I’ll be Jar Jar Binx
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3. |
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What does it mean to be in love?
I look in your eyes, but your eyes are closed
I ask you to open them, but you’re asleep
How can you love me, when you’re asleep
Because, our love is like a giraffe that couldn’t reach the leaves
It’s like an oasis, without any palm trees
Our love is like watermelon with too many seeds
We should’ve got seedless watermelon
When was the last time we watched Sister Act 2?
It’s such a good movie, we should watch it again
My only problem with that film is, is there's a couple of tiny little plot holes
Like how come Lauryn Hill knows the dance at the end, even though she dropped out the choir till the last minute
Because our love it like and atlas from 1958
It's like wearing pants… that are made of heartbreak
Our love is like a painting that you just can’t hang straight
No matter how hard you try you just can’t make him straight … hang it straight
And this bed feels so much bigger now
It’s probably cos I bought a bigger bed
The old bed was doing a number on my back and it was falling apart
Just like my heart...
Our love is like a corset bursting at the seams
It's like a cannelloni, filled with empty dreams
Our love is like a silhouette of a broken soda stream
Oh I didn’t even wanna get a soda stream anyway
Our love is like a meerkat trapped in a pillow case
Like a daffodil… made of toxic waste
Our love is like toilet paper stuck to your face
How did it even get there in the first place….
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4. |
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Taste's so good
Sugar-Oh's!
Gotta wake up with that Sugar-Oh taste
Taste's so nice
Sugar-Oh's!
Give you energy you need to play
Taste's so sweet
Sugar-Oh's!
So good
So nice
So sweet
It's the best way to start the day
Sugar-Oh's. It'll be nice!
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5. |
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I was never lonely
Living as a bachelor
Everybody warned me
Then you flipped me like a spatula
I had it all figured out
I was never gonna settle down
If I’m acting strangely, it’s cause you changed me
I’m trying not to run away
Don’t let me give up on giving you all I got
I might act stupidly
Cause all of this is new to me
Don’t let me give up on giving it through and through
Cause the only giving up I wanna do
Is giving it all to you
Girl I know you feel it
You’re nothing like I’ve ever seen
And it ain’t no secret
My past isn’t squeaky clean
I was bad to the bone
Silk sheets expensive cologne
If I’m acting weirdly
It’s cause your near me
Tell me it will be ok
Don’t let me give up on giving you all I got
Sometimes I might slip
Cause it’s hard to teach old dogs new tricks
Don’t let me give up on giving it hand in hand
Cause the only giving up I’m gonna stand
Is giving you all I can
If I seem complacent, please be patient
Cause I’m used to banging lots of girls
Don’t let me give up on giving you all I got
If I’m flirting at the bar
It’s only cause old habits die hard
Don’t let me give up on giving it through and through
Cause the only giving up I wanna do
Is giving it all to you
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6. |
Pop Singer
04:26
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How come, no one takes me seriously?
I don’t know why, is it cause I’m so intimidating?
I’ve done everything to be pleasing artistically
I’m not, asking a lot, but why don’t people respect me
I can't figure it out!
When I was a little girl
Didn’t know what I wanted to be
An architect
Then the next day a chef
So many possibilities
But even back then I knew
A job where looks don’t matter the options are few
But a career was waiting
I won’t get judged for ageing
And people won’t criticise what I do….
So I became a
Female pop singer
That’s what I had in mind
A job where no one expects
You to sell sex
Or be an object of any kind
A female pop singer
Where the music is what it’s about
Nothing demeaning
Songs that have meaning
Not just drinking and going out
I look at some women out there
And I think to myself, it’s just not fair
Calling them pretty faces
In work places
When they’ve got so much more to share
Looks are only a game
And if it’s all that you seek it’ll drive you insane
I feel so bad
For women that have
To deal with that shit everyday
That’s why I’m a
Female Pop singer
I’m gonna make it someday
Cos no one’s obsessed
With how you look or dress
They just want to hear what you have to say
A female pop singer
I just can’t wait to get signed
With a record label who shares
Percentages fair
I mean it happens all the time
I’m so glad I found a job where looks don’t matter
And no one ever judges you if you get fa… smarter
No one cares about your weight
It won’t be front page news if it fluctuates
And that’s why when I’m done singing I’m gonna be…..
A female movie star
Where there’s never a shortage of work
And you can’t be too old
To play complex roles
I mean that would just be absurd!
A female movie star
I’m gonna be unstoppable
Cause nobody cares
If you’ve got grey hairs
Or if you’re still “fuckable”
How come, no one takes me seriouesly...
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7. |
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I came knocking on your door in the middle of the night
But you’re never home no more something just ain’t right
Normally I would be just fucking some other guy
But I’m obsessed with you I can’t explain it
When I can’t have you I just can’t take it
I know that I’m the one who blew you off before but
Now that you’re gone I want you even more
You were always telling me you’d take me anywhere
You had so much time for me, and boy I didn’t care
I was out, thinking bout, who else I could find out there
I didn’t realise what I’d done till you stopped calling me
Fooling round just ain’t no fun, when you’re not chasing me
Now I don’t know, where to go, when I need you to give it to me
But I’m obsessed with you I can’t explain it
When I can’t have you I just can’t take it
I know that I’m the one who blew you off before but
Now that you’re gone I want you even more
I want you even more
Now that I can’t have you
I want you even more
I came knocking on your door in the middle of the night
But you’re never home no more something just ain’t right
Normally I would be just fucking some other guy
But I’m obsessed with you I can’t explain it
When I can’t have you I just can’t take it
I know that I’m the one who blew you off before but
Now that you’re gone I want you even more
I’m obsessed with you I can’t explain it
When I can’t have you I just can’t take it
I know that once you’re back, I’ll probably get bored but
Now that you’re gone I want you even more
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8. |
Crangles: Gimme A Pack!
00:46
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Muummmm... I've got a tummy ache...
Hey kid! Shut up and open a packet of
C-C-C-Crangles your favourite snack!
G-G-G-Gotta have em, gimme a pack!
I can't live without em, better than crack!
I love Crangles, Crangles yeah yeah!
Crangles come in all new flavours! inlcuding:
Spicy Lemon
Angry Mango
Lettuce and Milk Powder
Borrowed Self-Esteem
Pig Dentures
Quadratic Graphs
Knife
and Repiliian Regret
G-G-G-Gotta have em, gimme a pack!
I love Crangles, Crangles yeah yeah!
Mmm yummy!
Yeah yummy
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9. |
I'm A Good Person
04:45
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I’m a good person, I do good person things
Not with my actions, but with my thoughts and my beliefs
I’m sending out love and positivity
Back into the earth, that’s gotta count for something
I’m a good person, how could I not be
I’m always doing good… I mean, when it’s good for me
But I’d never wanna hurt somebody else, the thought just makes me sick
Unless it’s indirectly, then I’m totally fine with it
It’s not like I’m there in the flesh
Running the sweatshops in Bangladesh
How was I to know when I bought this dress
For 5.95 it was made by a 5 year old
In a 5 story building, with no fire escape
And I hate that’s the way it is, it’s so corrupted
What have we done to this world, we really fucked it
Of course she deserves an education and full stomach
But don’t I deserve to buy shit I don’t need on a budget
I’m a good person, just read my facebook posts
I’m always raising awareness where awareness needs raising most
And sometimes I even think about volunteering somewhere
And then I get emotional, cause of how much I care
I’m a good person, I think good person thoughts
Ask me how much I think about good things, the answer is A LOT
I’m gonna expand people’s minds, I’ve got so much to say
But the company I work for, doesn’t feel the same way
How was I to know when I applied
For this position online, that they would be the kind of sugar company
That sells addiction to infancy
And is basically as bad, as cigarette adds from the 50s
I know that it’s wrong working for this organisation
Using my songs for blatant manipulation
But it’s hard to find work in my particular vocation
And if I didn’t do it someone else would have my occupation
So is it really so bad what I do
I bet it’s not worse than you
I feel like you’re passing judgment, as if my life is that abundant
The way I live is really modest, except every 2 years I buy new apple products
And I drive to work, I know, petrol consumption
But without it my life couldn’t function….
Unless I genuinely try to change
But change takes time and time takes money
And I’m spending all my money on really good sandwiches
I’m not a bad person, I wouldn’t hurt a fly
Unless that fly was standing in the way of my desired way of life
I’m just trying to get through each day, like everybody else
Am I not a good person, if I think about myself?
I was always told to follow my dreams
Do whatever it takes, cause the ends justifies the means
And if that means children and teens around the world are
Suffering, as long as my things are pristine
What does it mean to be humanitarian
I know I’m not hitler but even he was a vegetarian
And I’m eating chicken wings like a fucking barbarian
At least I’m not trying to make the whole world Aryan
Part of me thinks that now I’m guilt free
Since I’ve acknowledged my selfishness openly
If I say I’m an asshole I’m allowed to be an asshole
Is that how it works? I’m so confused….
I don’t really know who the fuck I am anymore
I think I’m a person, but I’m not really sure…
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10. |
Relapse (feat. Jak2Jack)
03:15
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Jak2Jack be nimble
Jak2Jack be quick
Jak2Jack ain’t fallin for your dirty tricks
When I look into your eyes I knew I had to get my fix
You lit the fire on Jak2Jack’s candlestick
Jak2Jack be patient
Jak2Jak be still
Jak2Jack ain’t fallin for all your cheap thrills
I followed you everywhere, I lost my will
I broke my crown when Jak2Jack tumbled down that hill
Fool me once, shame on you
Fool me twice, what am I gonna do?
I’m gonna keep my distance
When you call my name
Cause when I hear your voice I might collapse
If I have even one hit of you, it messes with my brain
Stay away girl
I’m gonna relapse
Jak2Jack got swindled to the Jak2Jack extreme
Jak2Jack got sold a pack of magic beans
I climbed atop that beanstalk
Searching for my dreams
But I chopped it down
cause starting now
Jak2Jack is clean
I’ll wear the patch
I’ll chew the gum
Cause you’re my giant
I have to overcome
I’m gonna keep on fighting
Every where I go
Gotta make amends for what’s now in the past
I’m in a 12 step program
Jak2Jack “just say no!”
Stay away girl
I’m gonna relapse
Hi I'm Jak2Jack and I’m a loveaholic...
(Hi Jak2Jack!)
Fool me once, shame on you
Fool me twice, what am I gonna do?
What am I gonna do??
I’m gonna keep on fighting
From dusk to dusk till dawn
I’ve gotta get this sexy monkey off my back
And I can’t think about you
Till the cravings are all gone
Stay away girl
I’m gonna relapse
I’m gonna keep my distance
When you call my name
Cause when I hear your voice I might collapse
If I have even one hit of you, it messes with my brain
Stay away girl
I’m gonna relapse
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11. |
Ups & Downs
04:38
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Like a warm embrace
From the one you love
You can’t get enough
Of that sweet and warm embrace-ey love
Well good things you better count
Cause life has many ups and downs
You might find yourself
In a world of downs
You gotta remember the ups somehow
Like a ticking clock
That ticks with every tock
It might not seem a lot
But that clocks giving all it’s got
Well time is always here
Till one day it suddenly disappears
You might find yourself chasing the past
You gotta remember none of this lasts
And when she climbs the ladder
You might not understand her
She’s chasing all the things she wants
Then why is she so much sadder?
Like a melody
That you can’t ignore
And you’re not quite sure
If it’s one you’ve heard before
Well tunes come and go
But when you sung it so long it’s all that you know
You might find yourself trapped in a song
When music is playing nothing seems wrong
Every heart beat in your chest
Is only there to bring success
You win some
You lose some
You win some
You lose some
You lose some
You lose some
Like a hopeful dream
That always makes you smile
And everything’s worthwhile
Cause surely you're close after so many miles
Well dreams can save your soul
But if they never come true, will you ever be whole?
You might find yourself surrounded by goals
Engrossed in your story
Outta control
You might find yourself losing the plot
Buried in plans
Obsessed with your thoughts
Waiting for payoff
Waiting to crack
You dig yourself deeper
There’s no turning back
All of a sudden, everyone’s gone....
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12. |
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Energy Crunch!
You gotta get yourself some
Energy Crunch!
You know you wanna eat it
Energy Crunch!
But you don't eat it too fast now
Energy Crunch!
Save some for later
It's gonna crunch you up!
Energy Crunch!
You give your uncle a punch
Energy Crunch!
You wanna eat with a spoon yeah
Energy Crunch!
Torpedos for lunch
Energy Crunch!
Energy Crunch!
It's gonna crunch you up!
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13. |
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Why you gotta wear your hair like that
Because Feminism
Why you always gotta dress like that
Because Feminism
Why you wear so much make up all the time?
Because Feminism
Why don’t you put on more make up sometimes
Double standards
Yeah yeah yeah yeah
Girls can do anything
Girls can do anything
Girls can do anything
I'm going out with the girls
Because Feminism
Actually no, I'm gonna stay in with the girls
Because Feminism
You can't tell me when I'm gonna go out or stay in with the girls
Because Feminism
I'm gonna go have a wine with the girls
Girls can do anything
Girls can do anything
Girls can do anything
Girls can do anything
Girls can do anything
Anything anything anything
Everywhere we've been, we will go
Will it vanish, will it last
Is it future, is it past?
What does it all mean, I don't know
Moving forward in reverse
Is it better, is it worse?
Some people still afraid to say the word
Why you gotta write songs like this?
Because Feminism
This song is so short
Because Feminism
Why are you like that
Because Feminism
How come... ugh doesn't matter
Girls can do anything
Girls can do anything
Girls can do anything
Girls can do anything
Girls can do anything
Anything anything anything
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14. |
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I covered myself with honey
Cause you catch more flies that way
What I’m gonna do with a whole lot of flies I don’t know
But I’ll figure it out, once I’ve got them
Now I’m walking around in this lonely city
Covered in honey… and a shitload of flies
Why did I think this was a good idea
I’ve already been arrested twice
Get out of the store, they said
Put on some clothes, they said
You’re tracking in a lot of ants
So I put the item back on the rack
Walked out of pumkin patch
I guess honey doesn’t count as pants…
You can’t please everyone
I dressed up as an ugly duckling
But I didn’t become a swan
Don’t wanna intimidate peeps
With my babin’ swan style, got it going on
Now I’m walking around in this lonely city
Covered in feathers, and some flies from before
I’m starting to think I should’ve cleaned these feathers
Before I stuck them to my skin
Get off of our roof, they said
You’re scaring our kids, they said
How did you even get up there?
You leave your back window open, I said
I climbed in once you were all in bed
If you didn’t want people living on your roof, I just assumed you would’ve kept everything locked?
You can’t please everyone
I look in the mirror everyday
And I think to myself
There’s a lot of puss on this mirror from pimples I’ve popped
I should clean that…
I became a superhero
Tampon Girl: soaking up crime
If you’re ever in danger, I’ll be there in no time...of the month
Now I’m walking around in this lonely city
Waiting for someone to cry out for help
It’s really hot in this giant tampon
But at least it’s absorbing my sweat
Get out of the church, they said
Is it cause I’m Jewish? I said
No, it’s just that you’ve been singing the ninja turtles theme song through this entire baptism
I’m trying to make your kid cool, I said
Get the original ninja turtles theme song in his head
Because the new one fucking sucks....
Get off of the stage they said
“why don’t you Play some BON JOVI!!” They said
I don’t know any Bon Jovi, but I can play 'St Alfonzo’s Pancake Breakfast' by Frank Zappa? ….
So I put my keyboard back in it’s case
Got fired from another place
Who knew Frank Zappa would be so polarising?
You can’t please everyone
Some of the people all of the time
All of the people some of the time
Some of the people some of the time
None of the people… none of the time…
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15. |
Three Part Harmony
05:27
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It’s been a long time baby
Since things went your way
It’s hard not to feel like the whole world’s working against you
You backed the wrong horse baby
Now you’re starting to pay
You’re the horse, and you’ve lost, is what I’m trying to tell you
Don’t you know there’s an answer to all of your problems
You can solve them
It’s the easiest thing
All you gotta do is sing
In 3 part harmony
Just sing in 3 part harmony
It’s hard to feel bad or think about anything sad
When you’re voices vibrate through the air
3 Part harmony
Just sing in 3 part harmony
There’s no need to dwell, just believe in yourself
And find at least 2 friends who can pitch really well
Things might seem bad right now (oh oh)
Cause you’ve got no one right now (no one)
You’re all alone, you must feel pretty isolated constantly
And don’t forget about your underactive thyroid (underactive thyroid)
Oooh and you’re gonna lose your job
When you got no, skills to fall back on (no skills at all)
If you open your ears you will hear the solution
This is proven
There’s no need to mope
All you have to do is find your note
And sing In 3 part harmony
Just sing in 3 part harmony
Singing together can fix it all
As long as you don’t need anything practical
In 3 part harmony
Just sing in 3 part harmony
You can’t be a grump, or down in the dumps
When you’re part of that glorious sound!
Yes I know, you feel low, but you don’t have to wallow
Playing solo
Everything will be fine
As long as we all come in on time
In 3 part harmony
Just sing in 3 part harmony
It’s hard to feel bad or think about anything sad
When you’re voices vibrate through the air
3 Part harmony
Just sing in 3 part harmony
The feeling’s divine, it’s yours and mine
If you know unemployed singers with lots of free time
Hey I just thought of something...
If singing in 3 part harmony feels this good...
Imagine how good more parts harmony would be
Yeah! More singing equals more fun!
Come on everybody! Let's go!
4 Part harmony
5 Part harmony
6 Part harmony
7 Part harmony
8 Part harmony
etc harmonies
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Jude Perl Melbourne, Australia
Singer-songwriter-comedian Jude Perl has established herself as ‘one of the most genuine, honest feeling performers going around’ (Theatre People) who presents ‘hilarious and painfully spot on observations’ (Plus Ones) mixed with ‘insanely clever and comical songwriting’ (Melbourne Observer). ... more
Jude Perl recommends:
Unbelievable album. Every song is incredible, and so varied, yet so cohesive. Toehider (Mike Mills) is legit one of the greatest songwriters and musicians I've ever heard.
go to album
Incredibly moving, absolutely beautiful songwriting.
go to albumIf you like Jude Perl, you may also like:
supported by 4 fans who also own “Jude Perl and the Saga of SugarHope Records”
What great progressive powerful music. I Like It!😃🖖The Vinyls are Killers. Tax sucks, but THIS Album is worth it🤟😀🖖✴️
go to album
A vibrant co-mingling of funk, psych-pop, and R&B from Los Angeles musician Jonny Kosmo, with summer-ready samples for days.
go to album
Deleted Scenes
by Once And Future Band
featured on Bandcamp Radio Jun 3, 2020
go to album
featured on Bandcamp Radio Sep 25, 2018
go to album
